Kelly Counselor's Conversations

A discussion about life and how school counseling fits into it all

Words Aren’t Enough

on April 24, 2016

I had the privilege of meeting several awe-inspiring students today at a local Gay-Straight Alliance meetup, as I will be our school’s first advisor beginning next year.  I also fortunately was able to meet Peg, an advisor at a nearby school who told me something still resonating with me.

Like many GSAs, Peg’s group had some push-back getting the group started, both by students and staff.  Members were frustrated as to why they felt unable to convince the protesters of the facts supporting that LGBTQ students didn’t “choose” their lifestyle, aren’t sexual predators, are much more like every other student than not, etc.

Peg told them, “the reason they’re not listening is because words aren’t enough, because their minds were made up before you even started.  Co-existing with them, serving with them, hanging out with them beforehand is the key.  If they know where your heart lies in other areas before you even have this conversation, while you may not convince them fully, you made a chip in their thinking.  A lot of chips can add up.”

WOW.

I think back to my post “Customer Service” where I mentioned listening to others but really just waiting for our turn to speak.  I worry especially in this day and age, with the immediacy that technology and social media provide to say whatever is on our minds (whenever), that this action is further exacerbated.  We can fact-check to death, Google search this and that, prove our point, take offense when someone isn’t “PC”, and argue and create a Facebook thread a mile long, but without the relationship and ACTION, most of it is meaningless.  It just is.

Thoughts dictate action, and action dictates change.  Let’s all be a little more mindful to not just say what we’re thinking, but do it as well.  A small chip to our routines can add up to a lot as well.

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